so I am looking into seeing
and I am listening to who of me is hearing.
sort of, the who of me, who is doing those things?
and, of course, when did we get connected?
and who do they work for, within me?
sight gives me overlays,
movies in front of other ongoing movies,
small screens in front of the big one.
and there is the shift in focus resolution
from outer views to sometimes, inner imax.
they seem to work for someone within me
but not directly for the obvious me.
and then there is the listening that goes on.
yes, there is the surround-sound all around
but also there are these distinct voices,
clear and regular and familiar.
they individually intervene,
sometimes interjecting, unexpectedly.
they all make some vague-to-profound sense
but I don’t think of myself as a collective.
these, are not my outward voice
but still me, as my inner conversing, I guess.
I don’t really know them
but they seem to know me well.
so I am gathered in awareness,
sensing who sights for me
and who speaks to me or through me.
and not clear that I am, so to speak, in charge.
we all get along, seamlessly, it appears.
but I feel like a frontal presenter-host,
disguised as a party of one
and not everyone around me seems that way.
most people are a consolidated self.
but then there are the crazies.
but I am not speaking about them.
just about people who are somehow a gathering,
as having access to more channels
than just a personal self.
what is with this?
and more seriously,
what is it they/we/me have going on?
is this just all more of
the undeniable self of the self?