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Saturday, June 30, 2018

coffee of the mind 6/30/18


I had the detachment of over-thinking
meet up with
the detachment in over-thinking.
it’s as if forensics and philosophicals got together,
which ever,
to figure out who works for whom.
so they meet for coffee of the mind.
I own the café of their existence.
I come in early 
to make the blends for both of them
to sip and soothe.
self-friendliness can be a getaway experience
even unto oneself or so it seems.
cleanup on aisle three or nine
was not needed today.
neither were there any superficials 
or pleasantries needs to be exchanged.
like old friends, 
they sat in a corner 
by a window 
worldly looking out.
their talk and listen 
created background melodies.
this whole place in me
is a witness protection facility.
we, as the we of me,
pride ourselves on effortlessness
in service to a sense of self as loved.
we are conveniently located on the crossing corners 
of paradox and predicament.
it is a drive-by for some
and a daily for other parts of me.
condiments not necessary for these two.
we are all like family now when we meet.
today will have journey.
glad we had this time.
they both seem freed up. 
step by step,
each in their own inner demeanor 
of way . . .






Friday, June 29, 2018

the tall of unsaid words 6/29/18


those were tall, unsaid words.
they had mood 
that crept out and looked down
into all the vacancies near by 
until filled with stark voiceless-ness. 
but yet couldn’t say it back to myself 
directly either.
couldn’t translate any of this clearly,
yet it gave me a steep of sidedness, 
as if broken colored-glasses to see through,
twisted and calling out in half-thought views.
as puzzling as this is and ever fast approaching, 
it was as if a surround without edges 
to start up assembly towards solutions with.
at first, any conclusion my ‘inwardly’ stated
cannot be true, 
to turn and face me now.
you, as the unspoken one,
can’t be the forest behind the bland of trees I see,
with those muted song-fest lyrics 
that frozen eyes say back into the face of winter
by looking inexplicably far way.
these are somewhat suspended stills that exist here
as the presence made of broken melodies 
that in parts and pieces silently mumble to say,
yet, in those far-off grounded ways,
that look back upon the unintended privacies of me.
I am not wearing a checklist as my apron of order.
my critical mind has fallen into the language trap.
there is no safety with words
in any of my crossing-guard assumptions made.
but I do have a grip on my free-fall, 
by tears building, coming from deep and afar.
remembering clearly that emotions have wings
and I am in the wings of the windswept. 
even as if embraced
yet having no mind 
to give me mountain or branch of safety.
however distant and vast you are,
I look out at you
as if looking far within to real eyes.
we are more then the shatter  
from these episodes of stone against stone 
that express for us.
grind has this life of its own.
but we have the common of soul,
yet feeling for that, 
the tall of unsaid words 
only has its self-privacy in silence,
to speak of . . .











Thursday, June 28, 2018

the news (haiku) 6/28/18


our news of the day
we all hide behind our think
emotions, our nude



Wednesday, June 27, 2018

the living bible 6/27/18


reality is a Judas character trait
we all seem to diligently possess.
where by in our act-outs,
capitalism is our bedtime story teller.
and in this story 
being told to us as avid listeners,
as the story continues to unfold,
we all stand up to understand
we all sit down to experience
we all lay down and gradually fall asleep
as a way of living.
the divine mother,
is represented by earth in the story
but she, as feminine, is out of the picture.
national news media is always the tone 
of the voice speaking the story to us.
and since we all have fear as our ears
and lip services as our responses
on a daily basis,
the story is being written 
just before it is read.
so quite privately 
a question that is not really asked
but is certainly on the back of some of our minds is.
was religion ever really the theme for all of this?
and if so,
are we the living bible
always just before it went to print?




Tuesday, June 26, 2018

hurt 6/26/18


hurt only happens in self-conscious ways
hurt is a conclusory status 
that sends out our sensors 
to identify and give us a respond
as if in an eventfulness as a dialogue
the essence of our self gets seduced 
into a lessor state of audience
a staged reality begins to take over
as a central view
and affect on us is a top priority
there is less of spirit because of override-evident
the universe becomes myopicly viewed
the reduction is into a dualistic version
of us, as humans, against it, as the cause of hurt, 
as then the pain is objectified 
as if that is a clarity presented
fear is the operative that is evident
it is a bait and switch situation
where by capitalistic intervention is used
medical, as if financial in undertow, is implied
help is a currency of sorts exchanged
one becomes the rabbit in a test case situation
not to resolve but to venture
the big and the deep picture is displaced
the languaging is designed, as if scripted
one is audience to oneself by this method
the healer of self is dismissed 
early in this process
bystander assistance is offered
‘we all die of something’ is a given inference
so far that is thought of but not yet spoken
as long as we are self-conscious 
hurt happens as eventful
feeds the story of self
as if isolation, an appropriate context,
is expected to be the norm
you are inwardly asked
to rise up and be conscious
but not in these self-conscious ways
the spirit of you knows no bounds
hurt is a constant in the smallness of sensing
when one over-grips on self, in that aware
hurt starts as a noun
and then becomes a verb in the story of living
hurt is only wardrobe 
yet everybody is bound to dress up
your hurt is localizing
but you, as spirit, is vast
give vast, as a context, a chance
breath in, through and beyond
as a way of giving hurt of the self
a healing perspective . . .



Monday, June 25, 2018

history (haiku) 6/25/18


and so it is said
history repeats itself
expections’ say

Sunday, June 24, 2018

giving forth from within 6/24/18


I thought it was romance
rising up like a tide from within
the surge coming forth and filling
our bodies in the begin 
of having at the sweet of it
I was in the forethought of animation
but then you turned into all-pour
every now and then
I found myself captured 
in front row audience to you
taking still-shot impressions
as if memory was more the worth
then fluid-motion would overwhelm me
ignited grace would dance forth
having thoughts were footnotes
fading fast into the surround
everything thought to be solid
became liquid celebrating the ourselves of it
movement was language pronouncing
as in the converse
that there were ever stopgaps to life
seemed so far away as if ever
for then, as if remembered against for now
churn is turning dance into delight
as all that could be said
spoke as movement
it was not conversational
as if as questions followed by answers
or remarks and then retorts
harmonies were a given as sizzling
fluids of being, requiring no names
we were going beyond
where questions question
and where answers, 
in a timing respectful fashion, respond
there was this hammock of us, slung 
from horizon to horizon
the secrets of nature
finally let us in
as the whispers became all the hum
full body became the worker-bee joy
all the senses relaxed on the intake
for in these moments 
when fear of the ocean disappears
and all of the swim is oceanic organic embrace
where the palate of beingness 
is not posing or the projection of stances
and passion has no positions of itself
as the on-come of urge
there, right there,
the cycle of human liquidity is in full flow
for this, as recognition, 
does not take a stance
the purpose of full bloom 
has now become the broadcast of presence
there is no sense of need
no photos to be taken
no memories to be made
but the isness, of itself, lives on
giving forth from within
and all of this, completes of itself
as if oneness is coming into its own . . .








Saturday, June 23, 2018

how about now 6/23/18


the experience of now is 
really after the fact
experience of the fact 
is way after the now
if you think about it
you’re already too late
yet cognition is always on time 
but never really current
understanding is only an accessory 
to that crime

Friday, June 22, 2018

lookey here (haiku) 6/22/18


having its moment
is phenomenology
mindset melody  

Thursday, June 21, 2018

the oneness of us 6/21/18


there is a moment
that initially comes on like a memory
but its presence, full-bloom, fills the now.
sure, there are anecdotal visuals
as if to fulfill one’s cursory needs.
but it all has a 6th sense feel to it
as a dimensional closeness that demystifies. 
snippets of conversations from the past, leap up 
filling one, yet they come and go 
as if moody clouds in the distance passing.
for now, there is only the warm breath
of this internal check-to-check immediacy, impressing.
for how we, you and I, are together like this
only exposes any sense of time for its intrusion.
that we would feel for the show of embrace 
is only impulse as if we ourselves
are in reflex as our own audience appreciation.
all of this as wonderment, still-point anchors us
as if the rest around one is but life in passing.
surely all of our experience has at it as its fill
but this just buoyantly carries us upward and on
as if our spirits are in the shadows,
forever coming forward 
to fully pronounce and justify.
but this is not the residue of experience 
as if seasonal in passing.
this is the depth of immersion
as if we have come together from soul.
we go no further falling forward
as if time has formally dissolved. 
there is this reverence, of its own makings.
that we have each had thoughts 
that have surely taken us up, yes (?).
but they have had no pace of their own makings like this.
for this enfoldment deep-dive completes us
as transcendent in a sense of self reverence.
we could be one with everyone 
in this absolute of surrender,
if we met this oneness of us, 
straightaway, in everyone . . .


Wednesday, June 20, 2018

from within 6/20/18


from the moment of first sight
the steel chill of these realizations
from the fountain of wonderment
still flooding
though somewhat incapable of grasp
as moments abiding attempt to grip
no doubt about our souls into one
revealed
but unity, as the human experience,
so duplicitous
working with karmic shadows
to see into this light
for this shimmering
that will not settle as knowing
honest primal though as ventriloquized voicing
yet deeply, a language unto its own
our watercolors of emotion
washing all the clothes we own
yet outfitted for different realms of reality, at play
tipping points galore seduced these projections
into deluge as inundation’s plea
swim as we must
as if not of the ocean within
give distance no regard
the pulse of one
lives beyond linger
to touch was the apparent premise
but embrace lives on and on
from within . . .


Tuesday, June 19, 2018

the all of we 6/19/18


I go out into the forest of no-means.
all I brought with me were receptors
but they have no apparent usage.
also I brought full-bodied sensory-aware
to take in what is offered.
but offering is not a medium of exchange that occurs.
even occurrence puts me on empty-alert.
I came here in experiential receivership
yet I am still in the summary of nothing to show.
maybe the concept of place does not apply. 
some part of me is laughing at my over-thinking.
my mind seems to be dismayed in dress rehearsal.
I seem to have the habit of expectation as overbearing,
encouraging me towards the premise of results.
but none of these seemingly apply.
in appraisal, I appear to be equipped 
with a tourist’s sense of wants and needs,
like I am deeply invested in a here-to-there.
a mind-scan of self-consciousness
only causing a mirror-reflection affect.
maybe it was all my assumption
that mind-effort would take me there.
maybe what I conceived of as possible
has now become, how I conceive as the possibility.
that I considered myself, not to be there
may turn out to be
that I considered myself not there.
maybe not even the likelihood of a there.
that that ‘there’ does not exist.
that ‘there’ is only here, and now,
as if there exist as a foreign land,
unknown to me.
my attempt at full disclosure
only addresses my absence there of
and reveals a self-consciousness 
as an essential presumption.
for now, it appears that I exist as only raft,
floating on an ocean of the unrevealed,
as if this is metaphor as the matrix,
onward as my substantial existence.
what thought saves me
that is not entirely made of this exhaust?
thought is only an offering
and apparently never the revelation.
thought may be the undressing of the mind
from these menial tasks.
what seemed puzzling about it all
is that the puzzle may only have one peace.
and that peace may be the all of we . . .




Monday, June 18, 2018

every lament 6/18/18


life is a sleeper-berth on a matrix-train.
from the onset of birth as in darkness,
there is always ways and means of motion.
identity sips from these fluid waves.
animation is hiding the truth in there.
forever and belief walk-out, hand in hand
from the cavern of understanding
that sees for the light of day.
no one ever leaves the bed of their life
without feeling a sense of gravity as an imposter.
time introduces me to concepts 
like; here to there, the use of memory,
locale, expectation as a given,
and method as successful containment.
I don’t now how bothering with all of this works
but it appears to formally exist.
this is all, a forest of ethers, 
to others around me.
I seem to labor at it 
as if it is the task at hand.
so far I have discovered
that grip is quite different from grasp
and for me to assume that touch and embrace 
have the same parents,
is now in question.
it isn’t that I enjoy the sip of tea
as much as it is that the tea races through me
searching for a connection 
beyond the taste and the warmth displayed.
honestly, breath is the original tea
and my palate for that is quite habitual and bland.
I am not sure if thirst is as richly real
as much as ventilation of being fulfills a need.
why then do I feel demeaned by details?
I only want a truth that has no frame,
honesty as quantum existence,
and a mindfulness without depiction as a must.
every lament I make 
is a last breath of that part of me 
that lives in the substance composed of absence.
all of this, this language, is made of dander,
and I scratch to get the know out of me.
every say we make 
is a wave on the beach of self
away from the ocean of being 
we come from . . .





Sunday, June 17, 2018

chemtrails (haiku) 6/17/18


rain free wedding day
guaranteed by HAARP weather-
modification

Saturday, June 16, 2018

witness stands behind 6/16/18


witness stands behind

I breathe in 
as an internal optimist.
then, I breathe out
as a captive 
of judgment and conclusions.
what happens in between
maybe the muddledom of living.
it is the full spectrum
from reward to rejection
yet, every breath-in
is a new day
and every breath-out
seems to be the result
of sensory overload
taken in by cognitive business.
but there needs to be a levity 
to the experience enterprise.
impressions run in 
like newborns looking for nurturance
and I then see 
what I have to offer in return
whether embrace is a journey of burden
or whether it is a rise of reward.
my witness stands behind my watcher
and quietly observes.
this self-compassion handles every theme.
spirit serves up emotion
to every topic’s need.
sometimes this as a free-fall.
actually it feels like I am in time.
then, I catch myself in frame
and return to surrender . . .



Friday, June 15, 2018

a ‘fine print’ frame of mind 6/15/18


I‘m in a fine-print frame of mind.
didn’t say I was cynical
but I am suspect.
still have a sense of levity
but doubt it will lead to laughter.
may have a need for glasses
and the potential patience for rereads
and then the self dialogue
of murmured questions
followed by the low drone of quippy answers. 
I am somewhat resistant but assuming 
that I am moving towards their mindset
and they, who wrote all of this,
are not moving towards mine.
I do draw the line 
at the need to understanding legalese. 
and if they are speaking that way
then I will assume the mood of me
is moving towards the worst.
and after a very short period of victimhood, 
I will keep my glasses on,
go outside, 
directly to the garden,
to look closely at leaves and colorful flowers,
for the same fine print experience.
only to be rewarded 
in my mind for then.
the fine print of the sacred cut I see
makes headlines.
and then yes, fine print
does produce amazing revelations 
as rewards . . .





Thursday, June 14, 2018

under cover of starkness 6/14/18


belief cannot embrace amoral positions
taken and exhibited 
by others in control
one’s expectations, 
as a personalized method, 
are readily caught off guard 
when, in the monotony of familiarity,
the unthinkable seems to be occurring
the conjuring of an expanded universe of human control
as in human’s gaining control of the weather 
causing droughts, firestorms as a result,
flash-flooding almost out of nowhere.
weather-patterns shifting,
hundred-year weather events 
in one’s life time, repeatedly.
that is borderline conspiracy theory
shock into born-alive reportable heresy
historically, one cannot say things like that
at least not publicly 
and expect them to be profoundly evidential
so now, all of the habitual humdrum of daily life 
does not permit one to be readied for this intake 
this information, outside of their norm
secretly, you must have discovered
that experience, from the outside in, 
is overrated, well was overrated.
reality was just a menagerie of act-out propositions.
but this type of realization is act-out scary. 
sure, we are slaves of the mind 
and we act as if self-consciousness, 
human-self-consciousness, is judge and jury.
but then, this is how the virtue of sidedness 
comes to die,
transfixed in positions, held as fundamental truth
well, undeniable truth.
fixed positions as tent posts to our reality canopy 
and then to discover
that that basis of benign understanding is false allegiance,
that others, unannounced
have been wildly in the pursuit 
of a deeper sense of human control,
not alignment with 
but control there of.
a brake out from the dualities of right versus wrong,
a method without that kind of rendering,
an amoral approach beyond the positions
of right or ethical, or sane, or duly justified.
almost masked as the correct use of science
for the betterment of mankind,
but not really.
still the game of power and control,
exhibiting game-boards and think-tank efforts
to out think and out maneuver other humans,
as if the game is much the same 
but the stakes and methods are now more extreme.
all of the world is not about embrace.
some can never leave the game of control.
some have methods and tactics beyond account.
the human psyche is a delve.
the mind is the palate,
and we, are yet undisclosed
as the medium of display 
on the earth-stage yet to be revealed.
belief was such a simple way of means and custom.
the rituals of the future,
by these adversarial manipulation and means 
do not bode well for the simplicity-of-heart as method.
divide and conquer by diversion and secrecy
carries on as cathartic act-outs of pain and suffering.
deep thought has come into the hands of bastards
who self-loath themselves into power metaphors
and search for reality circumstances to play.
war is a box of crayons in their hot hands
but having only the colors of red and black to work with.
safety presented as cause is a false shield
fear is the driver,
and protection is from oneself, 
one human sense of self
not united self,
not the oneness of self
but the insidiousness of individual self
some survive, some gain power,
some are in control
all else are props and putty 
as the game is reduced to primal
in the most unauthentic way and means.
so here we are, 
undercover of starkness.
blame is a useless position to hold.
even position as a context
may be ridiculous.
tell me,
say to me, as if through me,
how does heart-felt have a life 
in each of us
going forward?


Wednesday, June 13, 2018

spirit beyond the know 6/13/18


it isn’t what you know 
that can save you
it isn’t what you don’t know
that does you harm
it’s how you know 
what you know
that does the irreparable damage.
not the items or the topics,
not the position, taken in stance
but what of mind, 
taken to the method of cognition
yielding into understanding, unwittingly,
that creates the capture of comprehension,
the ground-figure of self in placement,
the story-board for the text of living
that resides undisclosed within,
deep within and behind
the know that you know.
by the means 
of how you know, 
keeps you in check,
defends your beliefs,
creates the version of existence
that captures the meaning of life
that is used to justify
what you don’t know,
can’t know,
by any rational means.
but are and exist as
beyond rational mind’s projection
and yet well within the grasp of spirit 
beyond the know . . .

Tuesday, June 12, 2018

seriously, acquisition is not immersion 6/12/18


acquisition is not immersion
please allow me to explain 
so if you have acquired 
then you’d only have gained a sense of control
but still working under an unsaid assumption
that initially you were separate from that it to start
in order for the experience of gaining control
so if you had that power of control,
then one of the tenets of that power
is that you have the original self experience 
of being separate from it
but then you gained the self-adulation of control over it
so part of the benefit of that control
is that you had to have an audience,
either objects or people
who are in receivership of being controlled 
and are in response to being controlled
as possessions or service to your beck and call.
so if you controlled everything
that does not mean that in any method you applied
you have come into immersion
or any sense of oneness 
with these controlled people or things
then you’ve just continued to orchestrated a universe 
that demonstrates the premise of separatism 
at its most supreme state
therefore to you,
you have the power over all of these people or things.
so to backtrack in more detail,
so the use of the concept of supply and demand
is dependent the premise of need
and need is dependent upon the premise 
that you lack what you want
and your lack is dependent upon the premise of separatism 
in that you either have or don’t have
and that’s dependent upon 
a method of insular self-identification
where everything is objectified 
as objects of or for your usage
in the supply and demand account of living.
so if usage is dependent upon this theory
and this theory is dependent upon your think
and your think is dependent upon 
this particular style of insulation, isolation and separation 
as a means of self in identification
and within this personal sense of identification, 
there is the method of experiential distinction
and experience is totally dependent upon 
that kind of referencing
in order to identify all of everything
and the nature of identification is dependent upon
separation from it in order to identify it  
then the whole the nature of experience 
is a form of addiction 
that does not get you immersion
but only gets you acquisition by understanding
so the fundamental challenges are
to not use the brain 
in this computer-like coveting format 
but to use the brain into a quantum existence 
and part of that quantum existence 
is that you have immersion in it
and there is an integrity in this immersion
rather than a rational integrity 
to the logic of understanding.
so the most difficult self experiment 
is not education, discipline or success
the most difficult self experiment is 
how to channel the quantum existence 
of yourself into oneness
and if so, 
then life is not viewed as referential
and experience is 
only a trivial method of participation.
so then metaphorically,
experience is like the surface of the ocean 
and quantum is the embodiment of that ocean
and our sense of logic would only be 
an attempt to put shoelaces on winged feet.
and more so, in the experience of our minds,
beta brainwaves are like still-shots taken
generating alpha reality-movies
but these alpha movies 
do not generate theta holograms.
and the major element of reasoning for that 
is that alpha and beta states use a through-time-element 
as part of their essential development and presentation
to our normalized time-bound consciousness.
but theta does not essentially exist functionally in time
as its process 
to generate the hologram of immersion.
so rather than the mind-movie for audience experience
where by the audience is not in the state of immersion
either by experience or account
theta brain-state provides the opportunity
for immersion
atrophying the use of experience and audience
and subsequently the need to control
as well as the resulting 
separatism, ownership and possession.
all of which has become the entrapment of
our current nature of experience
and how we negotiate the land of self-consciousness.
then the primary discovery is
that we want immersion
but sadly, we settle for acquisition
and the circus that audience provides as living . . .