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Saturday, February 18, 2017

topic overwhelm 2/18/17

if I have one more topic overwhelm me into tears,
if I chase one more answer to stem the chaos inside,
if meaningful was supposed to resolve, for the cause,
if being angry was a show of force from within,
none of these things, tears, answers, meaningful or anger,
are more than just ventilative ploys of occupancy.

I don’t know the primary characters first hand.
I am shocked at what closets are out there, unopened,
how the act-outs are so behaviorally extreme
yet there are minds of shared blindness behind it all.

perpetrators, and the legions of surmise, creating affect,
sure, I have trust, but really only face to face,
with eyes wide open, feeling, finding way.

anything corporate, financial, or political
is but to question thoroughly, as masks for people.

if face to face was a liquid of lightening
then to feel all humans is to be achieved
but the linkage feels broken, the connectivity posed,
people burrow within and are buried alive puppeteering.

sun up gives no reason, no prime, no clearing appears.
without a script in mind, I am audience bent on appraisal.
I have no single-mindedness to leap into the post-fray.
I hurt for the imagined memories of theirs as mine.
I have the logic of death summoning me up as them.

so what I know of these crimes, the inhumanity, the deeds?
I have no face-time with them in the real, it is all taken up
as topic deals the hand I face and I am the cards I hold.

there is nothing on-line real about this as topic deploys.
I want dialogue as if an embrace is possible into kindling
with no story told, tells the truth to richly live into
feelings forged into the impotency of any topic’s journey.

like I said, I only have face to face as trustworthy to risk.
topic itself overwhelms, identity with it, is a crushing inside,
an animated numbness professing compassionate concerns.

when does the ride end, and the step out is ground secured?
reality is a stabilized flash flood ride,
yet can’t go deep below,
can’t get out of the mental wash as sudden is commonplace
topic only knocks at the door that experience opens to view.

topic overwhelm, I feel like a greeter engulfed in listening.
I am overcome with the monotony of impotency to respond.
I am suffocating in the outreach of concern unrealized.
I am amongst others of placative concern and response.
I needed a deeper bond of connectivity to launch from.

we are only a species and not an outbreak of reactiveness.
we represent as issues that divide us and demand’s reaction.
experience is the paper cut of the moment of itself.
literacy is not a fuel to be ignited to set the mind on fire.
topic, by way of delivery, is toxic, wrapped in its glory.

find for me a language of the currency of oneness,
where time does not dignify or displace my perceptions.
let’s not go there but come from there
as first-hand response.
look, the way we have it, we are a zoo unto ourselves
but think that self as observation, makes that not so.
go-fund-me is actually the beginnings started with self-love
until the quantum abides as commonplace awareness.
we are mouthing from a menu then expecting to be served.
topic overwhelm is the special of the day . . .

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