attention is losing its first person experience style.
attention is becoming
more of a flat screen reality viewing style.
sort of like audience perception
with bystander status,
as if I was there
but not involved.
yes, I saw what I saw,
but, I don't know what you are asking.
reality is passively aggressive
in that it is there and intrusive.
and I have weathered its presence,
even though I am not genuinely interested.
there is nothing fascinating
about getting through the day.
I make up what is interesting from me.
I live from breadcrumb to breadcrumb
in that way.
otherwise, it's a zombie-land out there.
it's straight up like television
but not easy to change the channels.
I am happiest when I am in control.
reality is slippery that way.
so I attempt to fill my life
with experiences that I can create.
thus I'm on screens as much as possible.
it's emotional animation to me.
better than the bystander status of living otherwise . . .
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