philosophy, I need a favor

 

for once I asked philosophy 

to look into the mirror.

not for the sensory feedback, 

already installed.

I wanted philosophy 

to nuance the viewing of itself.

for the who of me, 

that generally is assigned.

for the awareness 

of those methods in play.

for the witness 

behind what sees and senses.

for the take that is offered 

to be processed by 

the whom of me that gets its done.

I wanted to be a witness to that view.

one of me, 

but not of me, in that way.

one, who hardly would surface 

to these means.

one, who watches my philosophical, 

musing at the work that gets done 

by that me, 

that is in that way.

one of me, who is not restrained by words

but makes import to me in other ways,

gives me unexpected images,

and referential feelings out of the blue.

one, who looks at the safe keeping 

philosophy attempts to do,

but does not enter into the fray 

of reality-topicals.

one who nurtures from behind the within.

one who entertains this lifetime, 

for its richness of passage

but not drawn to be of the reveal.

oh, I am aware of thee, the genderless me.

I am aware of life 

as passage 

beyond the mention of particulars.

but I did want a sense of cogency applied.

that what of philosophy 

that is present as so described,

where the feel for me 

does not match the cognitive read.

one of me that is so pragmatic, 

while the others of me are of other worldly,

that I cannot make for common ground.

emotions languaged are cast of posers.

emotionally I am an open sea, 

without a camera or a mic. 

for there is no memory for simulcast 

at a later date.

philosophy of the mind has weight to it.

its labor is tactile, as self-consciousness.

philosophy of emotions leads me 

to my spirit,

even if this is but crayon work 

done on a reality page.

it is a lightness of touch,

and the fascination of colors expressing,

while my mind wants touch with pressure,

images to identify

and lines of morality honored 

as if never crossed.

I want philosophy to clarify, 

from before its singleminded 

of assignment.

please, look into that mirror

and speak to me 

in metaphors if necessary.

allow me to whittle away at a means,

beyond what understanding would craft. 

where I have spirit-speak, 

as an interpreter for my needs.

just look, 

even if it turns into a gaze beyond a stare.

or fluid me, 

with intake beyond a cognitive account.

I will trust in that swim or flight or run.

I am not in need of answers,

even though this appears to be

as an ask.

I want for beyond immersion.

where philosophy 

only historically overlooks, 

as if being in the know.

but also a place where, 

you too, can take off your rhetoricals.   

I know well the victimhood 

of speech overheard

just give me this impress 

without further drawn out account.

never again to bother the self

with mirror-time exposure.

as if I've come to see 

from beyond a sense of myself

ever, as if without intervention 

beyond the fallback position

of right away . . .