what did I just say?

what if our senses went for penetrative depth 

rather than the hammocks of surmise in recognition?

if specificity was whole wealth immersion 

rather than myopic pointy distinction?

if a brain state was as an open-ended resonator 

rather than bulletin-board retention?

integration is still one of our audience experiences,

not a migratory isness in the becoming.

I sense I am ever so trapped 

at reality vending machines' offerings.

choice is supposedly a freedom-game played,

but I am basically out-thought 

with every self-sense decision made.

banally wide-spread expansive, 

but customer keepsake intended.

most decisions as the trickle-down of ice melting

are either career based or stress recovery ordained

as the glacial platitudes of daily life advancing.

I guess I am asking for higher dimensional perspectives 

that culturally don't exist in a do continuum world.

it seems silly to say that experience is overrated,

but it feels that way much of the time.

I get suckered into expectation as a syndrome

and appropriately realize the plop of post results.

I think expectation is a bad technique 

but it has its prominence in a thought-journey life.

understanding is only a drive-by 

to any sense of a creative enterprise brewing.

we are not here just for the show and tell

but for inward expansion and being of advancement.

for me, the cutting edge of living requires inner challenges,

not wealth or popularity or production made evident,

but the feel of another person beyond the projection,

possibly even beyond the narrative they would advance.

I like to be in sync with others 

but not by the ever-check of agreement,

but certainly by vibes and common passion.

there is a dimensional richness for me there.

people who are the bounding joy of play 

rather than the focused on a need to win.

people who broadcast their spirit 

whenever and however 

in spite of the prevailing pronouncement of circumstance.

people who live their inner life 

as the most relevant to them.

how fulfilled can one be in a fact-check world,

where audience skills are my most developed talent?

ops, did I inadvertently say something

perceived as offensive?

damn, you'd think I'd put language to a better use

than expressing how feelings

sometimes rear up 

and find words to express both frustration

and yet deeper longings,

that seem to run into each other

on a daily basis.

that certainly, by others,

is perceived as my load-bearing biases.

did I cross the line

in a linear thinking world? . . .