Hope to see ya * 1/30/13

There are times

when everything seems so close

intimately so,

and yet as accomplices

somewhat very far away.

Times when my breath,

although close at hand,

is my best friend of insistence,

when my skin is a consensus public

voting on my behalf me

on issues that really hadn’t come

to my person’s attention,

when my bones moan

as if they live either

immediately upstairs or down stairs

and complain,

when my mind is like visiting

a subway station in rush hour,

and when excess salvia in my mouth

is concern for who last used it

and forgot to turn it off!

And they walk me around,

seems like senselessly at times.

I wake up to mid-sentence

and feel responsible to finish.

I can be laughing

and have no rhyme or reason

and certainly no excuse for that.

I can’t say I am sleepwalking

or ingested adventure, by any means.

Just rowing along,

noticed event after noticed event,

in an ocean of self in the moment,

and blam! I loose frame

or gain dimension

or become my invisible twin!

For then, most of quote, “reality”,

seems like

riding in a fast car and gazing out.

What I mean is,

that lots of reality for then

is like litter on the side of the road

in potential blur

if I don’t really focus in on it

and otherwise,

there is everything in the car, steady

and intimately in locality agreement

even though not existing as me

but right next to me,

if you get my drift.

I mean,

even my body is only right next to me

but we are speeding along together,

it seems.

I can’t really have a dialogue

with myself about this,

because the bubble bursts

and I am back to being me

with all this paraphernalia

of manifest self

and no capacity for slippage back out!

Control is not a usable technique.

I can’t force this to happen.

Obviously there is some incantation

or secret code that I do

that gets me there but I not know.

“Bugga, bugga”, I don’t know.

It’s like a kind of intimacy

that my real senses

are not prepared to go there.

Some translation on my part allows

for a sense of things to seem okay

but all too slippery

for experiential demonstration.

No, commanding it to occur

seems unlikely.

I am surely thinking

this happens to more people

then just me

but I haven’t met that way yet!

I mean, what are the odds?

And furthermore,

what do we do if we did?

Well better than that is,

if we did,

would we ever want to go back?

Hope to see ya there

and see what we do

for then . . .